I’ve written before about thinking about my life and where I’m going. And I’m back to thinking about it again. It’s been a month since my Grandma passed away and in a few days it’ll be a year since our son has. I’m thinking mostly about babies really. Plus my sister in law is due anytime in the next few weeks so I’m wondering when that baby will get here too!
Gang of kids – nephews and my own
I’m on course with school (in that I’ve contacted someone and need to get moving with figuring out what I need to do) and I’m on course with homeschooling (we’ve been going for a few weeks so far and it really is going so great). I could be doing better around the house 😉 but can’t everyone? I still haven’t gotten used to the small kitchen and know I need to because not only was our last house way too big but any house we’ll live in from now on will more then likely be around the size. So time to downsize or get super awesome at organizing! Probably a little bit of both.
I found a new way to make lists so of course the office supply geek in me was thrilled! I found todoodlist over the weekend and have written a few lists based off of it and am going to teach my kids how to use it. They are both list makers already (which makes me so happy!) – they usually write out a list of what we will do for the day, sometimes it includes the basics like getting dressed and breakfast and other times it’s what we are going to do when we leave the house. I think using this new method of writing a list will be fun for them.
It’s well know that I’m a list maker, are you?
And I always go back to thinking about babies. My feeling of my family being complete was so definite the second Jake was born. And I don’t have that anymore. I don’t know what will make me feel that way again but I’ve been desperately searching for it. I feel like I need to decide now, for a few reasons, and really just can’t. I almost just want someone to tell me what to do and their reasoning behind it. I’ve been trying this on my own – saying yes and why and then saying no and why. But I still don’t have that definite feeling I once did.
How did you decide how many kids you have?
Girl, I am still trying to decide when or if I’ll have kids. I’ve been thinking about it a LOT lately.
I don’t know what the answer is, and I’m sorry I don’t have any words of wisdom.
Girl, I am still trying to decide when or if I’ll have kids. I’ve been thinking about it a LOT lately.
I don’t know what the answer is, and I’m sorry I don’t have any words of wisdom.
I am still undecided too. Completely. Although I am wondering if a dog will fill that void for me. I know it sounds silly but they are a tad less work yet unconditionally loving 🙂
I am a list girl and always feel better once i take the time to make lists 🙂
chelles last blog post..Wild Week
I am still undecided too. Completely. Although I am wondering if a dog will fill that void for me. I know it sounds silly but they are a tad less work yet unconditionally loving 🙂
I am a list girl and always feel better once i take the time to make lists 🙂
chelles last blog post..Wild Week
We’re currently TTC. I’d tell you my theory of why I’m having four kids, but if I typed it out it would sound cold and calculated 🙂
Plus it sounds crazy. But four is my definitive number. Well four pregnancies. If I’m blessed with twins at some point then it will be five total kids coming out.
That number takes into account the awfulness of things that can happen in life. We made those decisions before having the first one.
I’m an overplanner tho.
We’re currently TTC. I’d tell you my theory of why I’m having four kids, but if I typed it out it would sound cold and calculated 🙂
Plus it sounds crazy. But four is my definitive number. Well four pregnancies. If I’m blessed with twins at some point then it will be five total kids coming out.
That number takes into account the awfulness of things that can happen in life. We made those decisions before having the first one.
I’m an overplanner tho.
Oh, I wish I could answer that question! I know just how you feel, I think. I lost a baby last year to a fatal neural tube defect, and still can’t shake that feeling that we’re not “done” having babies. Despite the fact that my husband feels we most certainly are done.
I was only 12 weeks pregnant at the time, but the defect was clearly visible on an ultrasound, even that early.
Part of me really wants another baby. Part of me is gun shy about the whole thing, afraid that something could go terribly wrong again. Part of me thinks I should just concentrate on being the best mom I can to the two perfectly healthy boys I have now. And part of me wishes I could have another chance with babyhood / toddlerhood.
Maybe there’s something about ending your baby-having years on such a negative note that stirs these feelings of wanting another?
I wish I knew. And I wish I knew how to be completely content with what I have. But it’s hard. It’s hard to silence that little maternal voice inside.
Hope you figure it out! And I’m very sorry for your loss – that really complicates the whole matter, doesn’t it?
Oh, I wish I could answer that question! I know just how you feel, I think. I lost a baby last year to a fatal neural tube defect, and still can’t shake that feeling that we’re not “done” having babies. Despite the fact that my husband feels we most certainly are done.
I was only 12 weeks pregnant at the time, but the defect was clearly visible on an ultrasound, even that early.
Part of me really wants another baby. Part of me is gun shy about the whole thing, afraid that something could go terribly wrong again. Part of me thinks I should just concentrate on being the best mom I can to the two perfectly healthy boys I have now. And part of me wishes I could have another chance with babyhood / toddlerhood.
Maybe there’s something about ending your baby-having years on such a negative note that stirs these feelings of wanting another?
I wish I knew. And I wish I knew how to be completely content with what I have. But it’s hard. It’s hard to silence that little maternal voice inside.
Hope you figure it out! And I’m very sorry for your loss – that really complicates the whole matter, doesn’t it?
I don’t have any words of advice and I didn’t know you lost your son…I’m so sorry.
For us, I always thought we’d have 3 kids and DH knew the moment I was pregnant with our youngest that we’d be done. But I can honestly say that I never got that baby twinge again. At least not strong enough to revisit the topic.
Everyone is different so I hope you get the answer you’re looking for 🙂
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I don’t have any words of advice and I didn’t know you lost your son…I’m so sorry.
For us, I always thought we’d have 3 kids and DH knew the moment I was pregnant with our youngest that we’d be done. But I can honestly say that I never got that baby twinge again. At least not strong enough to revisit the topic.
Everyone is different so I hope you get the answer you’re looking for 🙂
Christinas last blog post..Want Some Link Love? Only $2 for One Lucky Blogger
Hey,
I’m still trying to figure this one out. Like you, after the birth of my son and fourth child, I felt so “done.”
Then an unexpected pregnancy and loss and I knew I wasn’t done. I’ve been blessed with another since then and I didn’t have that same “done” feeling.
My feelings can go from one end of the spectrum to the other in the span of a day, sometimes less. At this point I’m starting to feel more and more done. But it’s hard to completely shut the door because my entire family wants more.
I guess I just want you to know that you are not the only one who’s totally unsure. It’s strange. I’ve never felt like this before. I always knew I wanted more OR felt totally fine with being done. Now, I don’t feel or know either of those things.
Wishing you the best on your decision. Be sure to post it here so I can see what you decided and how.
Stacies last blog post..A Very Common Sports Parenting Mistake
Hey,
I’m still trying to figure this one out. Like you, after the birth of my son and fourth child, I felt so “done.”
Then an unexpected pregnancy and loss and I knew I wasn’t done. I’ve been blessed with another since then and I didn’t have that same “done” feeling.
My feelings can go from one end of the spectrum to the other in the span of a day, sometimes less. At this point I’m starting to feel more and more done. But it’s hard to completely shut the door because my entire family wants more.
I guess I just want you to know that you are not the only one who’s totally unsure. It’s strange. I’ve never felt like this before. I always knew I wanted more OR felt totally fine with being done. Now, I don’t feel or know either of those things.
Wishing you the best on your decision. Be sure to post it here so I can see what you decided and how.
Stacies last blog post..A Very Common Sports Parenting Mistake